So apparently, Dallas PD thinks that it has the right to hand out excessive fines for running yellow lights (an entirely legal traffic transaction; in fact, I think that I probably saved lives and donated to charities simply by refusing to brake). Now, if I take the matter to court (which I fully intend to do, particularly if I can get Brian "Strongarm" Loncar to get my back) it's my word against that of an obviously crooked cop with *ahem* some obvious emotional baggage.
Well....I found the loophole! After hours at the Royal branch of the Dallas library (too near the scene of the alleged incident for comfort, mind you)spent researching law, criminal justice, crooked cops, Sacco and Venzetti, Dallas penal code, and Siberian tigers, I found out that it is NOT illegal to implicate a cop in a male prostitution scandal if you have reason to believe that the accused cop is a major ASSHOLE!
Monday, September 20, 2004
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1 comment:
On : 9/22/2004 9:16:34 PM Christ on a Cracker (www) said:
Hey, I just got a speeding ticket from a cop on the way to work last week.
What is it, National Texas Oink Fest 2004?
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On : 9/25/2004 6:10:46 PM professor (www) said:
Did the cop not recognize you? I bet he went back to the precinct to brag to ALL his bacon buddies about how he fined Jesus.
Ha.
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On : 9/26/2004 11:34:07 AM Christ on a Cracker (www) said:
(snicker) bacon buddies .... (snicker)
I think that cop has fallen too far into sin to be able to recognize holiness when he sees it .... plus I trimmed my beard that day.
Although ... he did look like he was kind of squinting from my shining glory a little bit. But it was sunny out that day. I dunno.
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On : 10/19/2004 3:52:17 PM Officer Pigsman (www) said:
Hi, my name is Richard Pigsman. I'm the officer who cited "The Professor" for speeding in her automobile the other day. You may think it's funny to "diss" authority figures, and maybe spreading hate and intolerance are your way of "getting down", but let me tell you: speeding is no laughing matter. Maybe "The Professor" has a PhD in stupidness??? Yeah.
Do you know how many people die every year in accidents that are caused by speeding? Several. And what's more, my alleged involvement in male prostitution is clearly not germane to the discussion at hand. Not that it's any of your business, but there's a big difference between providing full-body erotic massages to an exclusively all-male clientele for money, and what you so derisively refer to as "male prostitution". Let's face it, Professor: I'm twice the woman you are. Snap!
Oh, and Jesus? Don't be hatin' just because you can't hang with this! Whoop whoop!!!!
In conclusion, the revenue we raise from speeding tickets is used to fund vital government projects, everything from catching rakishly handsome international diamond thieves to cleaning up the endless, reeking mounds of shit that litter our public highways ever since the ill-fated LlamaQuest 2005 public transit initiative. As for the money that's still unaccounted for, let me just say this: custom-made rickshaws are expensive, so quit your goddamn belly-aching! The voters made their decision, and that's it. Besides, would you rather be crammed into an overcrowded subway car full of thieving subhuman perverts, or be pulled along in decadent luxury by an exotic, beautiful creature that has more than earned the nickname "Nature's Chinaman"? Frankly, it's a no-brainer.
Maybe that's why so many prominent public figures have come out in favor of Proposition 51, which allocates every last goddamn cent in the public treasury towards making this crackpot scheme work. Did I say crackpot scheme? I meant far-sighted initiative which will ensure a bright future for our children. Former governor Ann Richards referred to it as "an initiative....it boggles the mind." Senator John McCain refused to comment on Proposition 51, but that's probably because he was too busy taking a trip to the inside of his favorite bottle, if you know what I mean.....glug, glug!
Support Your Local Police and Firefighters
YES ON 51
For erotic full-body fantasy massage, feel free to contact me via email, or just come down to the station. Nobody really cares what we do in there, anyway. One time we sealed off the doors and windows, and cut a hole in the roof. Then we filled the place with piping-hot gravy, and started tossing in homeless kids, just for the hell of it. I shit you not.
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On : 12/9/2004 9:23:53 AM the professor 2 (www) said:
Hi, I'm not THE professor. But I am A professor, ,which means I have the right to lecture THE professor about how she doesn't care about us anymore and doesn't want to entertain us with her academia.
But I have to go back to work now, so I can't. Later!
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On : 12/24/2004 5:33:09 PM homie homie homie (www) said:
no joke "the professor 2". Ring the bell school's in, where's the teacher
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On : 1/11/2005 5:40:58 PM prof to the essa (www) said:
silence. all of you.
i'm on sabbatical.
i still have 2 months left. and technically, someone needs to pay me for even typing this comment.
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On : 1/19/2005 3:26:05 PM badworker (www) said:
POST SOMETHING!!!!
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